This is the simplest test possible, but the answer may be difficult to accept, proceed with caution.

What is this very simple test? Well, it involves one question only, and that question is: “Was the church or group my family was involved with while I was  growing up more important to my parents than I was?”

By this, I don’t mean that your parents believed that your salvation was of primary importance, and that adherence to values expressed by the church was necessary to securing that for you, and that for that reason you may have had to follow some rules you didn’t like. Instead, I mean a situation in which the needs of the church came before your needs. Were you pulled out of school because of church duties? Were vacation or weekend plans dictated or altered because of church needs? Were life choices made for you instead of by you? Did you feel like you wanted to simply wake up one morning in a family that simply loved and accepted you and wanted to hear your dreams for your life instead of hearing what God’s plan for your life already was?

If these things sound all too familiar, if you find yourself struggling with things that “normal” people seem to find easy, maybe it’s time to take a look at your past and consider the childhood you experienced. An interesting question to consider might be too ask what might happen if you were to now leave or disavow that church or group. Would you still be welcome by your family? Would that change your relationship with your family? If your continuous relationship with and access to your family hinges on your belief in, and adherence to values expressed, or membership in a church or group, you’re most likely in a cult.

If you are free to leave without worry of harm to your familial relationships, or friendships, then it’s pretty likely not a cult – cults don’t generally afford that type of freedom.

Still, if you feel there was something off about the religious group you were raised in, not having been raised in a cult doesn’t necessity mean that you didn’t experience religious trauma. In either case, seeing a therapist competent in treating clients who have experienced  religious trauma could prove helpful.

I’m slowly building a collection of trusted links on the curated links page of this website. It is a work very much in progress, so feel free to check for updates often.